Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The Doll who Ultimately Lied to me.

"Alternate routes" will continue shortly. We now pause for a brief rant and some advice.

So, I just got my hands on "Ultimates" volume three. I LOVED Mark Millar's Ultimates volume one and two. So... just... Oh my God... so GOOD! I was very excited to find Ultimates volume three.

I opened it up to see that Jeff Lobe (intentionally misspelled) was the writer. "Well, this will be crap" I thought. And I was right. Considering all the success "Jeff" has had, I think he can take a little bashing and I'm sorry for saying such things about another human being.

Honestly, how does this guy get work? How does he continue working? I can't name a single story this guy has ever written that I enjoyed in thirty years of comic reading. Look, this is the guy who wrote "Commando" and "Teen-Wolf." I frikkin hate this guy's writing, and yet not only does he continue to have success writing comics (and by success I mean never actually winning an award for anything, but continuing to churn out crap and get paid for it year after year) but he's also a consultant on Smallville (which is why the early seasons didn't follow any sort of continuity and sucked so much, not that I'm bitter) and also a a consultant/producer on Heroes, which also follows no logic what-so-ever. Yes that was a long run on sentence- sue me.

Seriously, how is it that Peter Petrelli can't beat Syler? Peter Petrelli only has to be NEAR someone to absorb their powers. Syler has to open their head up and examine their brain. Peter Petrelli can stop time, has super-strength, can fly, super healing ala Wolverine, and explode like a nuclear bomb. How exactly is Syler, hell, screw that, how in Hell could even Superman beat him? No one can beat a guy that can stop time and has all those other abilities. PLUS he can absorb all of Syler's abilities the second he comes within ten feet of him! A five year old can see the holes in logic there and yet, mister comic book guy executive producer just lets this stuff happen without blinking an eye.

Look, I can suspend my disbelief and believe in a world that has superheroes. But if you make the rules, you can't break them. The rules for the world exist, I follow them, I understand them, no problem. Break those rules and you've lost me. Heroes broke those rules too many times for me to continue watching.

Anyway, Ultimates volume three sucked. Period.

I have been hearing that Joss Weadon's new series "Dollhouse" is not living up to expectations. Ergo, I have not been watching it. But, he recently said that episode six and seven will really show people what he wants to do with the series. So, we started watching it from the begining.

It's interesting.

Episode six was awesome. Loved it. Episode seven was only fair. A few of the previous episodes were also amazing. We both loved the camping trip episode.

I am curious to know how he is going to maintain an audience for this. Considering the main character gets her memory wiped every single episode, how are we supposed to care for her? She's a new person every week. And looking at past shows successes, I don't understand how he can make us care for the characters. The secret to success for many, many shows is the premise that all of the characters are friends. They care about each other. They work together to solve problems. Sometimes they have romances.

Star Trek
Star Trek : Next Generation.

All shows about people who love each other and form bonds.

You know why Star Trek : Deep Space Nine sucked? No friends. No working towards a common cause. Everyone fighting all the time. At odds with each other and each had their own separate goals. That's not something you want to watch. That's like a bad marriage you're forced to tune into each week.

Wendy and I are really liking Dollhouse so far, but with each characters memory being erased each week, I wonder where Joss can go with this.

My housemate and long time friend Doug saved us a new series called "Lie to Me" and wanted to show it to us when we got home. Honestly, I was not impressed with the premise. We watched it mostly to respeect Doug's opinion.

Holy crap.


This is the kind of writing that makes me jealous. I want to write this well.

It doesn't even matter what the show is about because the writing, directing and production are so great it could be about fixing busted RV's and I'd watch it. It is just superb. Please, trust me on this, it is magnificent.

My highest praise to this show. Watch it.


  1. They changed Peter Petrelli's powers after he lost them and got them back. Now he can only borrow one power at a time. I think that the writers realized that they had painted themselves into a corner, and I suspect that it is the same reason that Hiro lost his powers. If you can do anything, where is the drama?

  2. Deep Space Nine was awesome. It just took about 4 seasons before it got good.

    I do know what you're saying, but IMHO DS9 is worth sitting through the bad marriage episodes, because it really was fantastic in the end.

  3. DS9 was decent. It was the Fraiser of TNG.

    Dollhouse is crap and Wheadon needs to stop blaming Fox, whom he has worked with at least twice before, and stop riding the Buffy/Firefly wave. Not everything he does is going to be gold (although Dr. Horrible was fantastic). Each week I watch Dollhouse and each week I am more and more disappointed. The only saving grace it has is that it is not as bad as Fringe.

    Even though I haven't watched it since Dr. Greene died, I'm kind of sad to see ER ending. It has definitly run its course, but I just liked knowing it was still on Thursday nights.

    Loeb's writing is bad, but I wouldn't praise Millar and then slam Loeb. Millar has written two good things. Two. Wanted and Red Son, and even Wanted had a shit final page. Red Son, however, was rather brilliant, but I am a sucker for What If? stories. Millar was also the creative mind behind the Marvel event 'Civil War' which was basically the beginning of the sodomy of the marvel universe which would be continued in 'World War Hulk'.

    Heroes is basically a trip to the comic book world for people that don't read comic books. Sure, Peter is/was basically unbeatable, but you know what? Thanos had completed the Inifity Gauntlet and powered himself down to fight the Marvel heroes and give them a chance. Phoenix destroyed an entire star system, but somehow the Shi'ar fleet was going to stop her. Both of them ultimately lost while they were both gods. Comics don't always make sense(unless The Big Three are writing).